Where It Began
In college, I created a version of me that was beyond what I knew I was capable of. I was incredibly disciplined. I studied for hours everyday. I trained in the gym 5 times a week and trained for football. I was social, yet not distracted. I was the life of the party, but never allowed it to interfere with my goals. I had dreams which I chased passionately with my entire heart. During this time, I felt like I was the main character… the one Reality itself was watching.
However, after tearing my ACL and getting a girlfriend, I stopped pushing myself to be my best. I accepted mediocrity. I didn’t work as hard as I could, didn’t focus on my diet enough, didn’t try to make new friends. I drank to much. I succumbed to lust. I had glimpsed my potential, but for some reason I stopped chasing it. This version of myself, of my mediocrity, was disgusting to me. I had no dream to chase… no vision of the future to pursue.
For years, I considered myself a shell of the man I once was. I could not find my spark. I stumbled and wandered, searching half-heartedly for the fire that once consumed my soul. Instead of finding the fire, I drowned my soul in worldly stimulation and sedatives like alcohol, social media, parties, porn, and other distractions. I traveled and bounced from place to place, seemingly living an amazing life, but actually I was just running away from responsibility.
I began to recognize that the spark would return during times where I sacrificed for a greater vision. My fire burned again when I was chasing an inspiring goal… one that resonated with me. If I didn’t have a vision of the future I was working towards, then I saw myself drift back into the habits that drowned the inner spark that made life so enjoyable.
The Devil at the Crossroads
Recently, I started working at a new job. It’s a lot to learn and has proven to be very challenging for me. It’s not necessarily a job that I enjoy either. When I first started, I had a moment of dread. I felt stuck already in a job/life that I didn’t want to be in. I saw myself hating the next 40 years of work as I saved up enough for retirement. I feared that this job would swallow me up and consume my fire forever.
But then I spoke with my mom.
She told me that this year will pass no matter what. The time will go by, whether I spend it productively or waste it away. So where will I be one year from now? What will my life look like when the time inevitably passes?
Will I waste this year, doing the bear minimum at my job? Will I allow my spirit to atrophy because I never push myself? Will I continue to eat junk and drink as much as I please? Will I continue to succumb to those worldly sedatives, never working towards a great vision of the future?
Or will I take this year and become someone unrecognizable? Will I find a dream for the future and chase after it with my whole heart? Will I rigidly stick to a healthy diet? Will I sacrifice things like alcohol, parties, and porn? Will I spend my free time writing and building this blog? Will I train at soccer and see just how good I could be? All of this, even when I’m tired and don’t want to? Will I take this year and suffer the overnight shifts that lie ahead of me? Will I build my money, grow in confidence, work on my social skills, and practice my leadership and charisma?
These are two very different possibilities for my future. It’s very important to look at them both, understanding that this year will pass by no matter what. It’s passing by right now, this very minute.
I can either stay where I have been these past 5 years, comfortable and numb, or I can shed my skin, transcend my past self, and grow to heights beyond my imagination through discipline and sacrifice. With intense dedication, I could even surpass my previous prime, and then my world really opens up.
My Dream for the Future
I allowed this message from my mom to sink in. It really hit home with me. It allowed me to breathe. I realized that I could take this year and grind. I could work towards a vision of the future. A future that would require all of my time and energy outside of work. Even if I don’t like the job that I have now, I won’t be here forever… not if I spend this time wisely.
Through rigid discipline, sacrifice, and transcendent focus, I can build myself a new life… a magnificent life. Come the end of this year, I could set myself on a mythic path. A life of meaning. A trail of dreams.
It won’t be easy. This will require a complete shift in my life. I can no longer do the things I once enjoyed doing. No more video games. No more drinking. No more chasing girls and hedonic pleasure. No more sleeping in and staying up late. My dreams are worth more than these things. The future rewards awaiting me at the end of this year, or 3 years, or 10 years, will be so incredibly worth the sacrifices demanded.
As long as my vision of the future is inspiring and charged with purpose and emotion, I will sacrifice to become all that I can be. I’ve already begun down this path, and I know in my heart it’s the right path to follow. My fire has finally returned to me. I can once again burn brightly in this world.
I’d love to hear what you think about this. Where do you plan on being in a year? What will you sacrifice this year in order to grow?
The Adventurous Mind 
Leave a comment